For those truly passionate about a particular hobby (i.e. writing, archeology, model trains, or motorcycles), look for a community group that services other people with similar interests. Your geographic location will determine whether or not there are readily accessible groups already ready and waiting for your membership. For those in smaller communities where the resources may not be as comprehensive, try talking to the owners of local shops you frequent to buy hobby-related materials and ask if they know of others to speak with regarding starting a group, or if you can post notices looking for other interested participants. Another idea would be to contact national organizations overseeing smaller local chapters to see if they are planning any speaking engagements or are looking to start a chapter in your area. Other ideas along these lines include attending LGBT film festivals, single parent organizations or meetings, and health-related support groups.
If you’re a sports buff, this is beyond perfect for you. There are loads of women who enjoy sports, but the sad part is that men don’t often get to meet such women because they don’t have the brains to seek them out at such places. So why not think outside the box? If nothing at all, you’ll end up having a fantastic time and would have easily made new friends!
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"I had two shift partners, one of whom ended up being my future wife. At the time, she had a boyfriend and I had a girlfriend, so while I thought she was cute, there was never any weird flirty tension. We shared one four-hour shift a week for about two years. Without really intending to, we became good friends because of the experiences we shared assisting clients and talking about our lives outside the hotline in between calls. Around the time she left the hotline, we both coincidentally went through breakups. We went from commiserating about our hotline work to commiserating about being single. Then one night she came over, we hooked up, and about a year and a half later we were married. I think what worked about meeting that way was that things developed really organically, because neither of us were there to meet people. We bonded over the work we were doing and the stuff we discovered we had in common over the years."
To make sure you’re that guy the only intention you want to have when speed dating is to have fun. Don’t worry about getting numbers or impressing anyone. Just see it as an excuse to meet cool people and do something different with your night. Make a point to chat with everyone – both girls and guys – before the event even starts. This way people will see you as the fun, confident guy who got everyone to loosen up and have a good time.
Animal adoption centers. Meet man’s best friend and potentially your next girlfriend. Let’s face it, shelter pups need the same kind of love and companionship you’re looking for. However, that doesn’t mean you must adopt a dog on the spot at a local shelter or animal rescue center. You can always go with the intent of simply interacting with pets who desperately need a human friend for a day. Most, if not all of these places will gladly welcome you with open arms.
What Real Men Say: "I played on a Zog soccer team for three years," says Andrew, 32. "I left the team as did another player to take a season off (which subsequently left two spots open). Kelly (my current girlfriend) and her roommate had just moved to Hoboken and joined Zog soccer as free agents and got put onto the team in my place. My friends on the team called me one day because they were short a player and asked if I could play that day to fill in. They introduced me Kelly, whom I immediately started crushing on. I told them to let me know if they ever needed a player again -- and then I started going back anytime they needed someone so I could see her. The season ended, so I decided to play the next season with them and developed some chemistry with her. We got together, and the rest is history."
Another place to meet single women who have similar interests as you is through local classes. Anything from a dance class to a cooking, art, or improv class can be a fantastic place to meet single women. Why? Because meeting girls in this environment gives you a shared experience to bond over. Plus, you’re in a space where everyone is messing up, and that vulnerability will have everyone feeling close and connected very quickly. This feeling of connection and bonding is going to go a long way in getting that cute, single girl interested in getting together after class.
To get the most out of these nights out be sure to show up early to whatever venue you’re going to. This gives you a chance to get acclimated and comfortable in the environment. While you’re there, warm up your social muscles by chatting with the staff and anyone else who’s around. As the venue fills up look for a “high-traffic” area – someplace people walk past frequently – and post up there with your friends. That way instead of running around looking for girls to talk to, the girls will wind up walking right by you.
"I met my girlfriend Stephanie at a book signing for Karen Russell," he says. "The line was kind of disorderly, so I turned to the person behind me and said, 'I didn't cut you, did I?' and she said, 'No.' That was Stephanie. I said, 'So are you a big Karen Russell fan?' and she said, 'Yes.' I asked who some of her other favorite authors were, and we chatted briefly. She got her book signed, then I got mine signed. Afterward I turned around, and she was standing there waiting for me. It turned out we were both going to Grand Central, so we walked there together. We had very immediate, very obvious chemistry. We got to the corner where we needed to split up, and Stephanie said, 'I want to keep talking to you though.' Her train was leaving shortly before mine, so I went with her to her train, then jumped off just as the doors were closing and hurried to catch my train. I had given her my business card, and she emailed me the next day. We've been together for almost five years."
Not only does volunteering for a charity event, community theater or fundraiser put you in an environment with like-minded people who share your values, but it also affords you time to spend alongside them to get to know them -- which is how Francis, 30 met his wife. "When I lived in Long Island, I started volunteering for a crisis hotline," he says.
We've all had this one happen to us in some capacity – whether it's a coworker's housewarming party or your neighbor down the hall insisting you swing by for a get together they're having, going to a party where you only know the host can feel pretty awkward. But even if you do go and don't meet any single women that night, you can make new friends and connections. There's always a chance you may meet someone there who can set you up with your future girlfriend or long-term relationship – as was the case for Alex, 29.
Get a part time job. Work at a restaurant if you need to expand your social circle and improve your communication skills at the same time. If you’ve ever worked a restaurant before, you’ll know why it’s one of the easiest places in the world to meet women. Most of the girls are looking for things to do after they clock out. Though, the job itself will almost always be grueling and suck.
It's been a long week and luckily I have a 3 day weekend with absolutely no plans. I'm single, caucasian, real (no rain today!) and ready to meet a fun, clean guy to drink and mingle with. This is my first time posting so I'm unsure what to expect, therefore, I'm leaving my options open. All I ask is that you are FUN, and can hold an adult conversation. Intelligence is sexy. Can't wait to hear from you! I'm still nervous about this so send a pic or I won't reply.
What Real Men Say: "Salsa dancing is part of my culture," says Javier, 26. "So when my sister's friend opened a dance studio in our neighborhood I came for the grand opening and complimentary salsa class -- and had so much fun that I ended up buying a class package. As one of the only men in the class, I had my pick of partners which was nice, and made a lot of friends during my time there. Around my fifth or sixth class we all planned on meeting up at a salsa club after class to try out what we had learned, and I saw my current girlfriend Ramona there with her group of friends -- one of which knew one of the class members I was out with. She introduced us, and we danced together until 2 a.m. when the club closed down. We've been together ever since."
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