Once he realized attraction was something he could learn, Brian spent way too much of his free time studying and practicing everything he could find on the subject. He stumbled across The Art of Charm podcast and eventually signed up for an AoC bootcamp. Excited by the progress he's made in his own life since the program, he decided to start writing for AoC to help other guys do the same. By writing about interpersonal dynamics, he’s finally able to put that psychology degree to good use. View all posts by Brian M →
Whether you are taking a couple of courses to upgrade, are a full-time university student or are passionate about tole painting, every community both large and small have courses you can take that will not only net you more knowledge but a whole new set of people to meet and interact with. If money is an issue, think about taking a class without getting credit or look into how old you have to be to receive free classes, since many universities now offer tuition-free options for seniors. And while you want to take classes that you have a personal or professional interest in, it never hurts to take something you normally wouldn't - if only because you have a hunch the type of person you are looking to meet would take that kind of class
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Think of the kinds of things you love to do, and then find other people to do them - it's really that easy. Or, is it? When I moved back to Vancouver, Canada, I struggled to make friends, much less find someone I was interested in dating. Someone offhandly mentioned a murder mystery party I'd thrown in another city and how much fun it was - so I went on Meetup and asked a few local groups if they were willing to host something like this. I hosted a party every month for over a year at a local pub that donated the space to us, and made a lot of friends, as well as met someone to date in the process
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To make sure you’re that guy the only intention you want to have when speed dating is to have fun. Don’t worry about getting numbers or impressing anyone. Just see it as an excuse to meet cool people and do something different with your night. Make a point to chat with everyone – both girls and guys – before the event even starts. This way people will see you as the fun, confident guy who got everyone to loosen up and have a good time.
We've all had this one happen to us in some capacity – whether it's a coworker's housewarming party or your neighbor down the hall insisting you swing by for a get together they're having, going to a party where you only know the host can feel pretty awkward. But even if you do go and don't meet any single women that night, you can make new friends and connections. There's always a chance you may meet someone there who can set you up with your future girlfriend or long-term relationship – as was the case for Alex, 29.
What Real Men Say: "I played on a Zog soccer team for three years," says Andrew, 32. "I left the team as did another player to take a season off (which subsequently left two spots open). Kelly (my current girlfriend) and her roommate had just moved to Hoboken and joined Zog soccer as free agents and got put onto the team in my place. My friends on the team called me one day because they were short a player and asked if I could play that day to fill in. They introduced me Kelly, whom I immediately started crushing on. I told them to let me know if they ever needed a player again -- and then I started going back anytime they needed someone so I could see her. The season ended, so I decided to play the next season with them and developed some chemistry with her. We got together, and the rest is history."
If you’re not sure where to start, we recommend sites like VolunteerMatch.org and GreatNonprofits.org. They’re kind of like dating sites — you put in your location and interests, among other identifiers, and the site will find the right organization for your needs. You can also read reviews from your peers to get an idea of the kind of work you’ll be doing and the people you’ll be interacting with.