Not exactly the best setting for getting to know someone, let alone landing yourself a serious, long-term relationship. Aren't there better places to meet a woman nowadays? Where else can you hope to meet your next potential partner? Are there better ways to meet girls? We asked a few real men who bypassed the bar scene to tell us how they met their current girlfriends -- and they had a few creative suggestions to share.
Sometimes you'll be rejected because it's not the right time in her life to be committing to a relationship. Perhaps she's going through a messy divorce, perhaps a big career move is on her radar or perhaps she just needs time to heal after a bad relationship. If she is really worth it, give her wide berth while remaining friendly and just be patient. Otherwise, wish her the best of luck and keep looking.
It's a surprisingly detrimental decision. A 2008 study in Social Indicators Research reveals that unhappy people watch 30 percent more TV every day than very happy people. "It's possible that TV causes people to be unhappy because it pushes aside time for activities with long-term benefits," says study author John Robinson, Ph.D., a professor of sociology at the University of Maryland and director of the Americans' Use of Time Project. "Or TV viewing is an outlet for people who are already unhappy."
Now you might be afraid that she’ll ask you why you are there. First of all, they almost never ask. If she does, just tell her you are taking a walk, or you like the coffee shop or that you have a friend that goes there, if it’s true. Or be honest and say that you don’t like meeting women at bars and clubs because they are too drunk and sloppy. You’d be surprised at how many women love that answer.
For the cost of a Yankees ticket (or less), you and your friends can each grab a multigame package featuring up to 13 MLB minor-league affiliates. Rooting for team sports can boost testosterone levels—yours as well as hers. And T is the libido hormone, so if your team wins, you both win. Try this: Split the cost of an extra package with your friends, and then take turns inviting someone new. It'll expand your weak ties, and the presence of friends creates a "celebrity effect" that can be as desirable as attractiveness or wealth.
Wondering where to meet single women? Well, know that a man who can cook is an instant turn on for almost all women across the globe. And what better way to hone your skills than by joining a class? You will get to interact with women there (barely any men join cooking classes), you will easily be the centre of attention and you will constantly be sharing tips, tricks, recipes and veggies with women in the class.
In many ways, meeting someone through an online dating site or app is similar to meeting someone through a friend—thanks to detailed online dating profiles, you have a chance to get to know people before you actually meet them. And swiping left in your underwear is much more convenient than getting dressed up and going out to a bar, so it’s no surprise that nearly one-third of marriages today start online, according to a study commissioned by eHarmony.com.
If you stick to a 6-mile orbit, your romantic trajectory is stunted as well. "In the stock market, diversification is critical to reducing risk," says Amir Aczel, Ph.D., a former professor of mathematics and statistics at Bentley University near Boston and author of Chance. "In dating, the same rule applies. You should vary the places you go, and when you go there. This diversification will result in increased probability of meeting women who respond well to you."
Meeting someone through a friend just makes sense, especially if you’re looking for something beyond a one-night stand, says sex therapist and relationship expert Kat Van Kirk, author of The Married Sex Solution. “A friend-of-a-friend will have more in common with you than someone off the street,” Van Kirk explains. “Occasionally, crazy chemistry happens between two people who have nothing in common…but usually not. You probably want to look for someone similar to yourself.” Van Kirk also points out that women—understandably—tend to be more safety-conscious when it comes to dating, and having a mutual friend who can vouch for you will go a long way.
Know when to end the conversation. Going on for too long can make you seem desperate or even scheming. When this woman is someone you'd really like to see again, say something like, "You know, I would love to hear more but I have to get back to work now. Tell me all about it over salsa dancing on Tuesday." Always leave the conversation to be continued. Do not exhaust the conversation as things can turn awkward and she may lose interest.