You can find out a lot just by asking subtle questions such as how often she comes there, how long has she been a member, what machines seem to work better than others. You know-casual stuff. You can even pretend you are clueless about working out and ask her if she has any suggestions for you or if she would be willing to give you a few pointers. Look for her the next time you come in and casually ask her if she wants to grab a drink (or coffee) afterward. So?
Your time to do that is shrinking, according to a 2008 Harris Interactive poll. Americans have just 16 hours a week—down 20 percent from 2007—that are all theirs. With leisure time scarce, many men make the mistake of blocking off a weekend night for dating, says Paul Dobransky, M.D., a Chicago psychiatrist who teaches men how to land any woman they want (check out a day in his life by clicking here). "Their lack of success is due to their hyperfocused approach," says Dr. Dobransky. "They see meeting women as something that is done rather than something that naturally happens, which is the way women view it."
Get a part time job. Work at a restaurant if you need to expand your social circle and improve your communication skills at the same time. If you’ve ever worked a restaurant before, you’ll know why it’s one of the easiest places in the world to meet women. Most of the girls are looking for things to do after they clock out. Though, the job itself will almost always be grueling and suck.
Try to avoid compliments that are overly focused on her looks or very generic. Chat up lines like, ‘did it hurt when you fell from heaven’ deserve to be banned for life. Also avoid clichés like ‘you have beautiful eyes’ as this may well make her think that you’re just another guy hitting on her. If possible compliment her on HOW she’s doing something, ‘I like how focused you are’ ‘I like how you have this big smile, it looks like you’re having a great conversation…’ and if all else fails keep it low key with an implied compliment like, ‘I just had to come and say hi.’ It’s a classic but a good one!
Apart from giving you a lot of fresh air, exercise, a change of location and lots of vitamin D, parks can prove to be extremely useful places if you wanna know where to meet single women. Of course, you can’t just sit at a bench and stare at women that pass by, so how about bringing a book, your dog, or simply your iPod with you. Even if you don’t get to meet someone, you’ll be doing something different in your rut of a life.
If you are also at Happy Hour with a group of your bros, and you spot a group of ladies near you with a similar amount of people, grab your/ their server, and buy them a round of whatever they’ve been ordering. It’s classy and it’s opening the conversation in a non-creepy way. If they’re interested, then they will probably come by and say thank you or maybe buy your round of shots if they’re cool chicks.
Public transportation can be one of the hardest places to strike up a conversation with a girl but, also incredibly rewarding if it goes well. It’s quite ironic because you could be sitting next to a girl for the next hour on the bus or train during rush hour. There are plenty of opportunities to chat a girl up but the most important this is to be mindful of her emotions, space, & comfort. It’s very easy to come off as a creepy guy if you’re not aware of these things
What Real Men Say: "I played on a Zog soccer team for three years," says Andrew, 32. "I left the team as did another player to take a season off (which subsequently left two spots open). Kelly (my current girlfriend) and her roommate had just moved to Hoboken and joined Zog soccer as free agents and got put onto the team in my place. My friends on the team called me one day because they were short a player and asked if I could play that day to fill in. They introduced me Kelly, whom I immediately started crushing on. I told them to let me know if they ever needed a player again -- and then I started going back anytime they needed someone so I could see her. The season ended, so I decided to play the next season with them and developed some chemistry with her. We got together, and the rest is history."
After you’ve paid a compliment, lots of the time she may not expect or know how to continue the conversation. A simple way to signal to her that you want the conversation to keep going is to offer your name. This also builds some trust as she gets to know you on a more personal basis. Say, ‘my name’s John by the way…’ before you expect her to share her name with you. If she doesn’t want to share her name this is a good cue that she’s not open to talking to you and you can simply wish her a good day and leave the conversation.
To show women you’re the guy they’re looking for make your profile as fun and engaging as possible. How do you do that? For starters make sure you’re in the right state of mind when you sit down to create your profile. If you’re feeling lonely, insecure, depressed, or anything like that, those negative emotions will influence the way you write. Women will get that negative “vibe” and will move on to the next guy. So if you’re feeling down go out and get some exercise, then take a pass at creating your profile when you’re feeling refreshed and energized. By putting yourself in a positive state of mind you’ll automatically create a more fun, engaging profile.
Read the signals: A woman’s body language is a good way to determine her interest. Is she leaning towards you or are her arms crossed? Is she asking you questions or simply being polite? Is she playing with her hair or fidgeting to try to get out the situation? Follow her lead to ensure that you’re both going in the same direction. If she is not encouraging your interest, take a step back and let her be.
"The rhythmic pulse of music lets listeners synchronize with one another, which can increase group cohesion," says Michael Cunningham, Ph. D., a psychologist and professor of communication at the University of Louisville. Concerts are good, but music festivals attract a more diverse crowd because of the different acts, and transcend the behavioral norms of everyday life. Visit festivalfinder.com for events near you.
Meeting someone through a friend just makes sense, especially if you’re looking for something beyond a one-night stand, says sex therapist and relationship expert Kat Van Kirk, author of The Married Sex Solution. “A friend-of-a-friend will have more in common with you than someone off the street,” Van Kirk explains. “Occasionally, crazy chemistry happens between two people who have nothing in common…but usually not. You probably want to look for someone similar to yourself.” Van Kirk also points out that women—understandably—tend to be more safety-conscious when it comes to dating, and having a mutual friend who can vouch for you will go a long way.
"I met my girlfriend Stephanie at a book signing for Karen Russell," he says. "The line was kind of disorderly, so I turned to the person behind me and said, 'I didn't cut you, did I?' and she said, 'No.' That was Stephanie. I said, 'So are you a big Karen Russell fan?' and she said, 'Yes.' I asked who some of her other favorite authors were, and we chatted briefly. She got her book signed, then I got mine signed. Afterward I turned around, and she was standing there waiting for me. It turned out we were both going to Grand Central, so we walked there together. We had very immediate, very obvious chemistry. We got to the corner where we needed to split up, and Stephanie said, 'I want to keep talking to you though.' Her train was leaving shortly before mine, so I went with her to her train, then jumped off just as the doors were closing and hurried to catch my train. I had given her my business card, and she emailed me the next day. We've been together for almost five years."
The beauty of forging weak ties is that while others hunt, you gather. To be successful, you need to continually meet new people outside your existing circles in order to find quantity and diversity in new links. All connections have potential. For example, you may have written off the guy with a wife or live-in girlfriend, but he's the money ball. According to a 2003 study in Social Networks, dating couples share 20 percent to 25 percent of their friends, but that percentage increases to 50 when they start living together. The result: His network is likely to be populated with more women after he moves in with her.
Hollywood would have us believe that there’s a certain type of man that single women are looking for; tall, dark, handsome, and preferably, rich. Thankfully, though, it’s simply not true. In a cross-national survey examining the biological and cultural influences of attraction, it was found that women most favored the following top five features in a man; humor, intelligence, honesty, kindness and strong values.
You need to be careful here because there can be many instances where it’s rude to approach a woman in such a public space. Many frequent coffee shops to get work done, so if she’s feverishly typing away on her laptop, you should definitely let her do her thing. But if you lock eyes with a female patron and get the sense that she’s into you, say something. Coffee shops are often frequented by intelligent and bookish individuals, so if that’s your type, order yourself a cappuccino and casually survey the atmosphere. It’s like Tinder, but in real life - what a concept! Since many who frequent coffee shops tend to be regulars, a slow game is an option. After enough time has passed, you can make a comment along the lines of “fancy seeing you here,” and - boom! Ice broken.
For the cost of a Yankees ticket (or less), you and your friends can each grab a multigame package featuring up to 13 MLB minor-league affiliates. Rooting for team sports can boost testosterone levels—yours as well as hers. And T is the libido hormone, so if your team wins, you both win. Try this: Split the cost of an extra package with your friends, and then take turns inviting someone new. It'll expand your weak ties, and the presence of friends creates a "celebrity effect" that can be as desirable as attractiveness or wealth.
It can be difficult to meet new people in a city, more specifically, it can be tough to meet women in a city. It seems that everyone’s post-college go-to spot to mingle with the opposite sex is a bar, nightclub, discotheque, whatever you want to call it. Basically, somewhere that supplies large amounts of alcohol, dim lights, and loud music (which are all factors to help you get laid). But how do you meet women that you may want to ask out (gasp!) on an actual date. There have to be other options between being that creepy guy at a bar that tries to get in bachelorette party dance circle and creating an online dating profile.
Join meetup groups or organizations that you enjoy such as hiking or wine meetup groups. You’ll find other women with the same hobbies so you’ll immediately have a connection and something to talk about. You can also take seminars or classes that interest you. I’ve found that a lot of women love to attend personal development workshops like PSI or Millionaire Mind Intensive and the women usually outnumber the men.
In her ‘safe’ space: Barre class. A nail salon. Any place that’s traditionally filled with women might seem like the perfect place to, well, meet women. But women aren’t stupid, and they can see exactly what you’re trying to do, says psychologist and relationship expert Tracy Thomas, Ph.D. “If you go to an all-female yoga class with the intention of meeting women, you’ll come off as creepy and exploitative,” Thomas says. “If you’re just there for the yoga, that’s different.”
As a general rule, women are more approachable and less suspicious when they meet guys through the course of a regular day and in an atmosphere when they feel at ease, as opposed to when a guy introduces himself in a more typical setting (bars or clubs, for example). For a lot of women, anything with a meat-market vibe is not ideal for meetin men, and if you go through this list motivated only by a slavering desire for sex, women will detect that insincerity, and you'll fool exactly nobody. Don't look at these as pickup strategies; just think of them as generally positive habits that happen to have an added benefit.