Now you might be afraid that she’ll ask you why you are there. First of all, they almost never ask. If she does, just tell her you are taking a walk, or you like the coffee shop or that you have a friend that goes there, if it’s true. Or be honest and say that you don’t like meeting women at bars and clubs because they are too drunk and sloppy. You’d be surprised at how many women love that answer.
Get to know them, learn their names, and remember them! Make it a point to recall what drinks they like to order or foods they like to eat, and of course, flirt a little! Just don't go overboard. A little mystery is fascinating to any mature woman, but especially so for an older one. Flattery is one of your best friends-and believe me-older women will remember it long after they leave. They (or she) will undoubtedly know what you are doing and will love it!
Your time to do that is shrinking, according to a 2008 Harris Interactive poll. Americans have just 16 hours a week—down 20 percent from 2007—that are all theirs. With leisure time scarce, many men make the mistake of blocking off a weekend night for dating, says Paul Dobransky, M.D., a Chicago psychiatrist who teaches men how to land any woman they want (check out a day in his life by clicking here). "Their lack of success is due to their hyperfocused approach," says Dr. Dobransky. "They see meeting women as something that is done rather than something that naturally happens, which is the way women view it."
Try to avoid compliments that are overly focused on her looks or very generic. Chat up lines like, ‘did it hurt when you fell from heaven’ deserve to be banned for life. Also avoid clichés like ‘you have beautiful eyes’ as this may well make her think that you’re just another guy hitting on her. If possible compliment her on HOW she’s doing something, ‘I like how focused you are’ ‘I like how you have this big smile, it looks like you’re having a great conversation…’ and if all else fails keep it low key with an implied compliment like, ‘I just had to come and say hi.’ It’s a classic but a good one!
If you’re the type of person that likes to do good for the community and you genuinely love helping people, one of the best places to meet women is volunteering. Also, along with having the added benefit of being in an environment with other like-minded people who want to serve the community what better way to communicate to a girl what kind of person you are then volunteering your time for a cause you genuinely care about & finding ways to help people in need. In the case you don’t know what causes you care about or what to do, I’d recommend making a list of things you deeply care about or if you still have no idea you can take a look at this list:
So why does the alcohol-soaked pick-up scene still exist? Aside from the obvious reasons (tequila, vodka, rum), there's a surprising one as well: inexperience. Men are new to this 21st-century version of the boy-meets-girl game. In 1970, the median age for marriage was 23 for men and 21 for women. Today it's 28 and 26. "It used to be that people felt they'd somehow missed out if they didn't have a spouse by the time they graduated college," says David Popenoe, Ph.D., founder and codirector of the National Marriage Project and a professor emeritus of sociology at Rutgers University. "Today, people feel they need to establish themselves economically first." The postponement of "I do" means most men will be single in their 20s, a trend that populates the bar scene and empties the church aisles.
Once he realized attraction was something he could learn, Brian spent way too much of his free time studying and practicing everything he could find on the subject. He stumbled across The Art of Charm podcast and eventually signed up for an AoC bootcamp. Excited by the progress he's made in his own life since the program, he decided to start writing for AoC to help other guys do the same. By writing about interpersonal dynamics, he’s finally able to put that psychology degree to good use. View all posts by Brian M →
"I work at a design firm on a small team of four," he says. "So when one of my coworkers bought a condo we were all invited over to celebrate. I was the only one on the team without a solid excuse for not showing up and plus, my coworker lives in the same neighborhood as I do so I figured I'd swing by. I ended up having a great time chatting with my coworker's sister and her husband -- to the point that her sister insisted that she let me set her up with her college friend who was moving here and didn't know anyone. I'm usually skeptical about people setting me up -- but she showed me a picture of her and I thought she was super pretty, so I agreed. I got her phone number then took her out a week or two after she moved to New York and we hit it off. She and I both always say how lucky we are that I went to that party."
The number one reason why approaching a woman may not work is that you don’t have her full attention before speaking to her. By attention I mean you should have her eye contact. This means she won’t be either a. surprised when you speak to her or b. not listening. If she sees you before you begin speaking to her she’ll be more relaxed and you can also checkout her non-verbal signals (is she holding eye contact with you and smiling?) to see if she seems open to talking to you. Sometimes you may need to use a gesture or say ‘hey’ to get her to look up. Then I want you to pause and wait for her to fully realize ‘a man is talking to me’ before you continue speaking with her.
The best way to do this (and there are lots of ways I can teach you to improve your conversations that I’ll talk to you about in later articles) is to share information about yourself rather than asking her questions. I know this seems counter-intuitive but when it comes to meeting women in real life instead of putting her on the spot with a question it will create more trust with her if you can tell her a few things about yourself whilst inviting her to speak.
A quick tip: a great time to chat people up is when you’re in line for the show or at the concession stand before the show starts, I wouldn’t recommend trying to talk to a girl you’re interested in during the middle of the show. If it’s a show where people are dancing, if you took my advice by taking dance classes this is where it would come in handy. Don’t forget to have fun & just please be mindful & don’t try to grind on her or be the creepy guy who grinds on women from behind.

Match has more than 30 million members. Think about it — where else are you going to be around that many single women? Not to mention the site gets 13.5 million monthly visitors. Its user base is just going to keep growing. Perhaps the most impressive fact, though, is that Match is responsible for more romantic connections than any other dating platform, so you’re in good hands.
Get a part time job. Work at a restaurant if you need to expand your social circle and improve your communication skills at the same time. If you’ve ever worked a restaurant before, you’ll know why it’s one of the easiest places in the world to meet women. Most of the girls are looking for things to do after they clock out. Though, the job itself will almost always be grueling and suck.
Yelp.com's 5 million local reviews can lead you to a dry cleaner, cafe, barbershop, or bookstore where all the cool people go. Post your own reviews and you may meet a fellow critic. The social-networking functions of the site allow readers to swap private messages, post public comments, and classify deserving reviews as funny, useful, or cool, so you can navigate them accordingly.
If you want to talk to a woman but she’s in the middle of hanging out with a girlfriend/reading a book/working on her laptop, instead of not saying hello at all I want you to let her know that you realize she’s busy. It’s better to show her that you’re considerate of what else is going on for her rather than waiting for a perfect moment (that never comes) to say hi to her. You don’t need to be overly apologetic you can simply say, ‘Hey (pause) I know you’re in the middle of…. But I wanted to say…’
Fortunately, our team has a lot of experience in this area and has put together a great list. If you want to meet older women dating younger men (or men your own age) you have to put yourself in their shoes and approach your search in the right way. These are very busy women with a lot going on. Try out our favorite spots below and make the most of your time!
The real world of dating is rough on men. The risk and onus of rejection are almost always on them, because men initiate about 80 percent of encounters. And the competition is brutal for men in their 20s and 30s: For every 100 unmarried women there's an average of 113 unmarried men, according to the U.S. Census Bureau. And those men just aren't doing the job. The Pew Research Center found that about half of young singles reported going on no more than one date in the 3 months prior to its survey, and 55 percent of singles who were looking for love said it was hard to meet people.
Granted, this one's going to take you out of your comfort zone, but how else do you expect to meet new people? At least at a dance class, as matchmaker Susan Trombetti points out, the odds would be in your favor. "Yoga, dance class, or a spinning class is a great place to meet women if you can get into it," she says. "I know lots of men who try this with much success. You will definitely be in the minority." Even if you don't meet a girl, you'll be improving your personality, which is a big help for single men everywhere when it comes to attracting beautiful women. And even if you don't happen to meet your special someone at dance class itself, acquiring the skill will be guaranteed to help you in the future..

Read the signals: A woman’s body language is a good way to determine her interest. Is she leaning towards you or are her arms crossed? Is she asking you questions or simply being polite? Is she playing with her hair or fidgeting to try to get out the situation? Follow her lead to ensure that you’re both going in the same direction. If she is not encouraging your interest, take a step back and let her be.


Whether you’re newly single and coming out of a long relationship or you have no experience meeting women and you’re trying to figure how to practice your social skills, expand your network, & meet women, it’s a common dilemma and no matter what situation you’re in, it a challenge nonetheless since you’re starting from square one. Whatever the reason, there’s never a better time than right now to go out and start meeting women. Since the weather is finally warm & if you have the luck of living in a vibrant metropolitan area or maybe even a decent-sized city, the odds are in your favor since you have thousands of opportunities to meet women that you like, that may have chemistry with, & maybe eventually get a new girlfriend if that is your goal. The question now lies in “where do I start, where are the best places to meet women?”

Read the signals: A woman’s body language is a good way to determine her interest. Is she leaning towards you or are her arms crossed? Is she asking you questions or simply being polite? Is she playing with her hair or fidgeting to try to get out the situation? Follow her lead to ensure that you’re both going in the same direction. If she is not encouraging your interest, take a step back and let her be.

This is an excellent way to contribute to the society, as well as showing your caring side to potential partners. There are very few attributes which can make a man as sexy as his kindness. Also, if surveys are to be believed, the volunteer network has way too many women and far too few men. Places like animal shelters are always your best bet, because apart from being in dire need of volunteers, you get to meet women who share the same passion as you do – animals. Other options include movie or music festivals, local theatre groups, homeless shelters, community drives, raising money for charity, running marathons and what not.
A few years ago I took an improv class to be able to think on the fly, prepare for job interviews, & get out of my head when I’m interacting with people. Besides the added skill-sets to my social tool box, I’ve managed to meet some really amazing people in these classes and my last girlfriend before she moved. My friend & I were the only two guys in this class of 10 with the other 8 all being women. Just like the last 4 suggestions I’ve made, these classes are specifically designed to breed social interaction.
A quick tip: a great time to chat people up is when you’re in line for the show or at the concession stand before the show starts, I wouldn’t recommend trying to talk to a girl you’re interested in during the middle of the show. If it’s a show where people are dancing, if you took my advice by taking dance classes this is where it would come in handy. Don’t forget to have fun & just please be mindful & don’t try to grind on her or be the creepy guy who grinds on women from behind.
Whether it’s a networking event, your alma mater’s alumni events, a young professionals organization, fundraiser, or a charity many of these social events attract women and provides you with a social context to easily converse with practically anyone. Most people go to these social events to make new friends & expand their social network. Be confident, be flexible, & most importantly be social.
"I had two shift partners, one of whom ended up being my future wife. At the time, she had a boyfriend and I had a girlfriend, so while I thought she was cute, there was never any weird flirty tension. We shared one four-hour shift a week for about two years. Without really intending to, we became good friends because of the experiences we shared assisting clients and talking about our lives outside the hotline in between calls. Around the time she left the hotline, we both coincidentally went through breakups. We went from commiserating about our hotline work to commiserating about being single. Then one night she came over, we hooked up, and about a year and a half later we were married. I think what worked about meeting that way was that things developed really organically, because neither of us were there to meet people. We bonded over the work we were doing and the stuff we discovered we had in common over the years."
Team play encourages what sociologists call "situational generalization"—in other words, positive circumstances help people click. "When people are working toward a shared outcome, they're more likely to grow closer together," says Parks. Recreational outfits make it easy to form new connections because individuals can sign up and be assigned to a team without needing to know anyone.
It's 2019 – why are you still trying to meet women at loud, crowded and expensive bars? There are so many different things that can go wrong. If it's too packed, you could lose a half-hour just waiting to buy a drink; too empty and it'll feel weird and sad, and you won't be able to meet anyone new. Finding someone you're interested in typically begins with you surveying the scene and looking for people who are both attractive and not visibly taken -- or settling for just one of the two. Regardless, what are the actual chances that you'll hit it off? You have to decide whether to go with a stock pickup line or a custom-crafted joke or just a question and hope you picked the right one to pique her interest. And keep in mind this whole scenario is most likely occurring while you're both yelling in each other's ears over extremely loud music and the sounds of other people having a good time.
We're willing to bet your kitchen skills are lacking, or at the very least could benefit from some professional advice. Why not take a cooking class? Not only will you upgrade your culinary skills and maybe add a few new dishes to your repertoire, but you're likely to find yourself one of the few men in attendance. Even better, for those shy about approaching women: you'll often be asked to pair up to complete a dish, giving you an easy way to start up a conversation over an omelet flambé.
Animal adoption centers. Meet man’s best friend and potentially your next girlfriend. Let’s face it, shelter pups need the same kind of love and companionship you’re looking for. However, that doesn’t mean you must adopt a dog on the spot at a local shelter or animal rescue center. You can always go with the intent of simply interacting with pets who desperately need a human friend for a day. Most, if not all of these places will gladly welcome you with open arms.
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