While online dating apps can and do lead to long-term relationships, sitting around swiping on your phone isn’t exactly the most effective way to meet women. In fact, new research shows that—surprise, surprise—we millennials are spending more time playing with our phones than we are actually going out and, well, having sex. In other words, put your phone away (once you’ve finished reading this article), and take a look at what the experts have to say on how to meet women.
Northeastern University researchers took their dig in a 2008 study in the journal Nature, after they tracked the movements of 100,000 cellphone users for 6 months. Their finding: People are predictable. Nearly half of their human lab rats kept to a maze that was little more than 6 miles wide, and 83 percent mostly stayed within a 37-mile radius. And they tended to spend the majority of their time in five or fewer places.
Meeting a potential relationship partner does not have to be confusing or challenging, especially when you have a particular goal in mind. You will often have the best success when you look in the places and ways that will bring you in touch with likeminded people. Specifically, long-term relationships are often found with others who are focused on similar long-term religious, spiritual, or educational activities in their daily lives. In contrast, short-term and sexual relationships can best be found with others who have such immediate excitement and pleasure on their mind—usually in the nightlife of bars, clubs, and restaurants. Finally, finding some specific relationship preference and need can often be accomplished by networking with others who are compatible in those ways—either online or through social groups. In any case, finding others with similar love life preferences and goals will bring you closer to satisfying yours.
If you’re not confident in your looks, you may be tempted to hide behind a low-quality or strategically cropped profile picture—don’t. “Make sure your profile picture is clear and shows both your face and body,” Van Kirk says. “This is not just about showing how attractive you are—women feel safer about online dating if they feel like they know who they’re talking to.” That said, studies have shown that guys get the best responses when their profile pics show them looking away from the camera and not smiling.
Without sexual attraction, most women that you meet won’t be interested in anything more than a quick conversation. If you’re lucky, they may like to have you as a friend. If you want to have sex with women instead of just being seen as a friend or being rejected after a few minutes of conversation, make sure that you focus on creating a sexual vibe between you and the woman and making her feel sexually attracted to you.