It can be difficult to meet new people in a city, more specifically, it can be tough to meet women in a city. It seems that everyone’s post-college go-to spot to mingle with the opposite sex is a bar, nightclub, discotheque, whatever you want to call it. Basically, somewhere that supplies large amounts of alcohol, dim lights, and loud music (which are all factors to help you get laid). But how do you meet women that you may want to ask out (gasp!) on an actual date. There have to be other options between being that creepy guy at a bar that tries to get in bachelorette party dance circle and creating an online dating profile.
We've all had this one happen to us in some capacity – whether it's a coworker's housewarming party or your neighbor down the hall insisting you swing by for a get together they're having, going to a party where you only know the host can feel pretty awkward. But even if you do go and don't meet any single women that night, you can make new friends and connections. There's always a chance you may meet someone there who can set you up with your future girlfriend or long-term relationship – as was the case for Alex, 29.
"I work at a design firm on a small team of four," he says. "So when one of my coworkers bought a condo we were all invited over to celebrate. I was the only one on the team without a solid excuse for not showing up and plus, my coworker lives in the same neighborhood as I do so I figured I'd swing by. I ended up having a great time chatting with my coworker's sister and her husband -- to the point that her sister insisted that she let me set her up with her college friend who was moving here and didn't know anyone. I'm usually skeptical about people setting me up -- but she showed me a picture of her and I thought she was super pretty, so I agreed. I got her phone number then took her out a week or two after she moved to New York and we hit it off. She and I both always say how lucky we are that I went to that party."
Of course, there are so many ways to meet women in real life but it’s hard to understand their personality or life interests judging only by their appearance. The best way to meet and date local ladies is trying online dating. This is the easiest way to find single girls from your area looking for the same things as you are: friendship, flirt, romance or a long-term relationship.
To get the most out of these nights out be sure to show up early to whatever venue you’re going to. This gives you a chance to get acclimated and comfortable in the environment. While you’re there, warm up your social muscles by chatting with the staff and anyone else who’s around. As the venue fills up look for a “high-traffic” area – someplace people walk past frequently – and post up there with your friends. That way instead of running around looking for girls to talk to, the girls will wind up walking right by you.
If you check out this site you’ll likely find events (happy hours, game nights, etc.) just for singles in your age range. But if nothing like that is going on, don’t worry. There are plenty of activity groups (hiking, going to sporting events, book clubs…) that will prove great places to meet single women. What makes these activity groups are so fantastic is they give you a chance to meet girls who have similar interests as you.
Do you have a dog? If not, get one, or borrow one from a friend. Offer to take the critter for a walk around town or in the park! Mature women love to see a young guy walking his pet and she might strike up a conversation with you-especially if she has a dog of her own. If it happens to be a younger woman who tries to come on to you, be polite but move on.
Sometimes you'll be rejected because it's not the right time in her life to be committing to a relationship. Perhaps she's going through a messy divorce, perhaps a big career move is on her radar or perhaps she just needs time to heal after a bad relationship. If she is really worth it, give her wide berth while remaining friendly and just be patient. Otherwise, wish her the best of luck and keep looking.