Have no expectations. If you go into a given conversation with expectations about how it will end (getting a date or even her phone number, for example), you'll risk coming off as desperate or forcing the conversation. Relax. Take a deep breath. Enjoy the conversation for what it is, and the woman you're talking to will be more likely to respond positively.
The best way to meet a girl is through activities, doing what you are interested in, and through mutual friends. Putting yourself in a situation where you are doing activities with groups allows you to establish common ground with women and get to know them over a period of time, rather than trying to best them with your one-liners. Tips on how to meet women: try to get out as much as possible, stay active and get your single friends together for group activities. Vote on this list of ideas for how to meet a girlfriend and add any places that have worked for you.
Read the signals: A woman’s body language is a good way to determine her interest. Is she leaning towards you or are her arms crossed? Is she asking you questions or simply being polite? Is she playing with her hair or fidgeting to try to get out the situation? Follow her lead to ensure that you’re both going in the same direction. If she is not encouraging your interest, take a step back and let her be.
It can be difficult to meet new people in a city, more specifically, it can be tough to meet women in a city. It seems that everyone’s post-college go-to spot to mingle with the opposite sex is a bar, nightclub, discotheque, whatever you want to call it. Basically, somewhere that supplies large amounts of alcohol, dim lights, and loud music (which are all factors to help you get laid). But how do you meet women that you may want to ask out (gasp!) on an actual date. There have to be other options between being that creepy guy at a bar that tries to get in bachelorette party dance circle and creating an online dating profile.
"Men are possessed by the myth of the pickup," says David Grazian, Ph.D., an associate professor of sociology at the University of Pennsylvania and the author of On the Make: The Hustle of Urban Nightlife. It's in their heads that these bars and clubs are "teeming with anonymous females who are dying to have sex with any guy who is confident enough to talk to them." The reality is that less than 6 percent of women report having had sex with their partners within 2 days or less of meeting them, and less than 20 percent of adults say they first met their most recent sexual partner in a bar. Perhaps it's the nasty stigma of nightlife: A survey of 1,034 women by StrategyOne, a market research agency, reveals that nearly one in four women would be embarrassed to admit that she met a mate in a bar. (But just incase you do take home the girl of your dreams this weekend, make sure you know how to blow her mind in bed.)
It’s no different than going to an industry convention. People go there to network. Sure, they learn a few new tricks and things but at the heart of it all is building up business connections. Even in the automotive industry, which generally lacks a female presence, I still know a guy who met his wife at one. When these events are hosted in Vegas, for instance, it’s a great way to mix business and pleasure without shooting yourself in the foot.
You need to be careful here because there can be many instances where it’s rude to approach a woman in such a public space. Many frequent coffee shops to get work done, so if she’s feverishly typing away on her laptop, you should definitely let her do her thing. But if you lock eyes with a female patron and get the sense that she’s into you, say something. Coffee shops are often frequented by intelligent and bookish individuals, so if that’s your type, order yourself a cappuccino and casually survey the atmosphere. It’s like Tinder, but in real life - what a concept! Since many who frequent coffee shops tend to be regulars, a slow game is an option. After enough time has passed, you can make a comment along the lines of “fancy seeing you here,” and - boom! Ice broken.
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After you’ve paid a compliment, lots of the time she may not expect or know how to continue the conversation. A simple way to signal to her that you want the conversation to keep going is to offer your name. This also builds some trust as she gets to know you on a more personal basis. Say, ‘my name’s John by the way…’ before you expect her to share her name with you. If she doesn’t want to share her name this is a good cue that she’s not open to talking to you and you can simply wish her a good day and leave the conversation.
Don't come on too strong. Have a keen sense of whether or not she's interested. Look for signs. If she ever touches your arm, holds your hand, flits her eyes, or laughs at your jokes, you are in. Do not try too hard (like making an hour's long list of topics to say); just give the basics she wants to know: your age, what you are doing for a living or education, where you are from, your personal motives with her, and if you have children. A new person in her life can be a daunting challenge; give her time to get used to you. Show that you can organize your thoughts for a conversation and are able to make your own proper sentences.