Trying to meet a woman you want to date out of a crowded bar has a lot of variables and circumstances that is out of your control. There is the process of having to scope out the surrounding environment for someone you’re interested in, dealing with her group of friends, feeling out whether or not she’s single, approaching her with an opening line to hook her attention, and the added social pressure of trying to sustain a conversation in a loud environment. Not exactly the most ideal setting for getting to know someone, nurturing a deeper connection, and getting yourself a girlfriend in the long run.
Your question may be answered right there and then. Normally this doesn't happen on your first try though so don't get discouraged. Wouldn't it be great if you didn't even have to ask where to meet older women, because that older woman may be wondering where to meet you! (In fact, while I was looking around online I found a lot more sites where the women are actually looking for younger men.)
Northeastern University researchers took their dig in a 2008 study in the journal Nature, after they tracked the movements of 100,000 cellphone users for 6 months. Their finding: People are predictable. Nearly half of their human lab rats kept to a maze that was little more than 6 miles wide, and 83 percent mostly stayed within a 37-mile radius. And they tended to spend the majority of their time in five or fewer places.
If you’re not confident in your looks, you may be tempted to hide behind a low-quality or strategically cropped profile picture—don’t. “Make sure your profile picture is clear and shows both your face and body,” Van Kirk says. “This is not just about showing how attractive you are—women feel safer about online dating if they feel like they know who they’re talking to.” That said, studies have shown that guys get the best responses when their profile pics show them looking away from the camera and not smiling.
Your time to do that is shrinking, according to a 2008 Harris Interactive poll. Americans have just 16 hours a week—down 20 percent from 2007—that are all theirs. With leisure time scarce, many men make the mistake of blocking off a weekend night for dating, says Paul Dobransky, M.D., a Chicago psychiatrist who teaches men how to land any woman they want (check out a day in his life by clicking here). "Their lack of success is due to their hyperfocused approach," says Dr. Dobransky. "They see meeting women as something that is done rather than something that naturally happens, which is the way women view it."
Exit the conversation early. This one might surprise you, but assuming you're having a first conversation with a woman you don't know (whether a stranger or a friend of a friend), cut it short. By doing this, you're ensuring you're not misreading the situation and wasting her time, in the event that she isn't interested, but you're also demonstrating that you respect boundaries and aren't a threat to her. And if she was enjoying the conversation, you'll leave her wanting more.
Even if you're not an all-star sports player, relationship expert Kayla Kalinski says playing on a neighborhood sports league can help expand your social circle and, in turn, open you up to the possibility of meeting that special someone. "One of the best ways we tell our clients to meet their future significant other is by joining community sports leagues," she says. "Worst case scenario, you just make a couple new friends -- but don't forget, friends know other friends who know other friends -- and your chances of being set up with someone special by your new buddies is greater than ever." If coffee shop hangouts are too cliché for you (or if you just don't drink coffee!), then a sports league might fit the bill – and, unlike at coffee shops, you'll be getting a workout in, too!
In her ‘safe’ space: Barre class. A nail salon. Any place that’s traditionally filled with women might seem like the perfect place to, well, meet women. But women aren’t stupid, and they can see exactly what you’re trying to do, says psychologist and relationship expert Tracy Thomas, Ph.D. “If you go to an all-female yoga class with the intention of meeting women, you’ll come off as creepy and exploitative,” Thomas says. “If you’re just there for the yoga, that’s different.”
For long-term relationships, you may want to look to meet someone during your daily life—particularly through a religious, spiritual, or educational activity. This may help to increase the satisfaction and longevity of the relationship. Presumably, the similarities also help partners to make a deeper connection and share gratefully with each other. Religious and spiritual compatibility may also reduce the likelihood of cheating and infidelity. Such relationships may require self-introductions though. As a result, you may have to overcome anxiety, learn to break the ice, and ask for what you want (even indirectly) to begin an interaction.
Of course, there are so many ways to meet women in real life but it’s hard to understand their personality or life interests judging only by their appearance. The best way to meet and date local ladies is trying online dating. This is the easiest way to find single girls from your area looking for the same things as you are: friendship, flirt, romance or a long-term relationship.
The number one reason why approaching a woman may not work is that you don’t have her full attention before speaking to her. By attention I mean you should have her eye contact. This means she won’t be either a. surprised when you speak to her or b. not listening. If she sees you before you begin speaking to her she’ll be more relaxed and you can also checkout her non-verbal signals (is she holding eye contact with you and smiling?) to see if she seems open to talking to you. Sometimes you may need to use a gesture or say ‘hey’ to get her to look up. Then I want you to pause and wait for her to fully realize ‘a man is talking to me’ before you continue speaking with her.
Yelp.com's 5 million local reviews can lead you to a dry cleaner, cafe, barbershop, or bookstore where all the cool people go. Post your own reviews and you may meet a fellow critic. The social-networking functions of the site allow readers to swap private messages, post public comments, and classify deserving reviews as funny, useful, or cool, so you can navigate them accordingly.
But the situation doesn't have to be that bleak. In fact, there's no better time to be single than during economic uncertainty. A recent eHarmony survey found that one in four single women say that financial stress has increased their interest in a relationship. Compare that with the 61 percent of men who say money worries are causing stress in their love lives. Look at it this way: More women are on the market, and they're primed to connect. But men are looking to meet them over $12 martinis—and are going home alone and broke. There's an opening here for you: Think patterns, not people. Forget the pickup lines and rely on the new rules of attraction. We can help you with the odds.
You are on the hunt and don't let anything get in the way! If you are still struggling with approaching women in public (and you are definitely not alone) there are a few books that made a huge difference in our success with older women. You could take a blanket along and lounge around while Fido does his thing, or you can actively seek the attention of an older woman by asking her a question or two about her own pet.
Español: conocer mujeres, Deutsch: Eine Partnerin finden, Português: Conhecer Mulheres, Italiano: Incontrare Donne, Français: faire pour rencontrer une femme, Русский: знакомиться с женщинами, 中文: 认识女生, Čeština: Jak se seznamovat se ženami, Bahasa Indonesia: Menemukan Wanita, Nederlands: Vrouwen ontmoeten, العربية: مقابلة النساء, ไทย: เข้าหาผู้หญิง