"Men are possessed by the myth of the pickup," says David Grazian, Ph.D., an associate professor of sociology at the University of Pennsylvania and the author of On the Make: The Hustle of Urban Nightlife. It's in their heads that these bars and clubs are "teeming with anonymous females who are dying to have sex with any guy who is confident enough to talk to them." The reality is that less than 6 percent of women report having had sex with their partners within 2 days or less of meeting them, and less than 20 percent of adults say they first met their most recent sexual partner in a bar. Perhaps it's the nasty stigma of nightlife: A survey of 1,034 women by StrategyOne, a market research agency, reveals that nearly one in four women would be embarrassed to admit that she met a mate in a bar. (But just incase you do take home the girl of your dreams this weekend, make sure you know how to blow her mind in bed.)
Be open-minded to all those interested in you. If you put an age-range or any other restrictive ranges into your wishlist, you could miss out on women who might be slightly outside those expectations but are ideal for you. It also sounds really bossy and perfectionist to list restrictive preferences and will scare off many women even if they fall within your restrictions.
We've all had this one happen to us in some capacity – whether it's a coworker's housewarming party or your neighbor down the hall insisting you swing by for a get together they're having, going to a party where you only know the host can feel pretty awkward. But even if you do go and don't meet any single women that night, you can make new friends and connections. There's always a chance you may meet someone there who can set you up with your future girlfriend or long-term relationship – as was the case for Alex, 29.
One of the best- but probably a idea you never considered in your quest of where to meet older women is volunteering. Try your local homeless shelter or a senior citizens home. Now don't laugh, and don't think that the older women you may meet are going to be feeble and confined to a wheelchair! I'm talking the mature women who come to visit these people!
If you’re not confident in your looks, you may be tempted to hide behind a low-quality or strategically cropped profile picture—don’t. “Make sure your profile picture is clear and shows both your face and body,” Van Kirk says. “This is not just about showing how attractive you are—women feel safer about online dating if they feel like they know who they’re talking to.” That said, studies have shown that guys get the best responses when their profile pics show them looking away from the camera and not smiling.
Meeting someone through a friend just makes sense, especially if you’re looking for something beyond a one-night stand, says sex therapist and relationship expert Kat Van Kirk, author of The Married Sex Solution. “A friend-of-a-friend will have more in common with you than someone off the street,” Van Kirk explains. “Occasionally, crazy chemistry happens between two people who have nothing in common…but usually not. You probably want to look for someone similar to yourself.” Van Kirk also points out that women—understandably—tend to be more safety-conscious when it comes to dating, and having a mutual friend who can vouch for you will go a long way.
The real world of dating is rough on men. The risk and onus of rejection are almost always on them, because men initiate about 80 percent of encounters. And the competition is brutal for men in their 20s and 30s: For every 100 unmarried women there's an average of 113 unmarried men, according to the U.S. Census Bureau. And those men just aren't doing the job. The Pew Research Center found that about half of young singles reported going on no more than one date in the 3 months prior to its survey, and 55 percent of singles who were looking for love said it was hard to meet people.
The single women are waiting, but they're not doing it in front of an LCD screen, where you're more likely to be most nights. On any given day, more women attend or host social events, volunteer, join religious functions, practice hobbies, or go shopping, while the average single guy is home, pathetically alone. Compared with single women, single men spend 45 minutes more a day watching TV and about 20 minutes more on the computer.