Have no expectations. If you go into a given conversation with expectations about how it will end (getting a date or even her phone number, for example), you'll risk coming off as desperate or forcing the conversation. Relax. Take a deep breath. Enjoy the conversation for what it is, and the woman you're talking to will be more likely to respond positively.
It’s no different than going to an industry convention. People go there to network. Sure, they learn a few new tricks and things but at the heart of it all is building up business connections. Even in the automotive industry, which generally lacks a female presence, I still know a guy who met his wife at one. When these events are hosted in Vegas, for instance, it’s a great way to mix business and pleasure without shooting yourself in the foot.
Just because you might not be in school anymore, that doesn’t mean you can’t take classes. We’re never too old to stop learning, and we’re never too old to stop meeting new people. Search online for some adult classes in your city and see what piques your interest. It could be painting (pictured below), cooking (pictured above), photography, guitar, and pretty much anything else you can think of. Most of these classes are probably pretty cheap, too, because they’re put on by colleges or local organizations. Plus, Groupon always has deals going on.
Parks, a University of Washington communication researcher and author of Personal Relationships & Personal Networks, has determined that 75 percent of the people who dated extensively the year before said they had help from a friend. In their corner is what Parks calls "the social proximity effect," which holds that the probability of two people meeting is directly proportional to the number of contacts they share. In other words, more friends means more female referrals. "Our research has shown that two-thirds of people who initiate a romantic relationship had met at least one of the dozen or so members of their partner's closest social network prior to meeting their part ner for the first time," says Parks, "and nearly half had met two or three." If you know Tom, and Tom knows Betty, then there's a greater chance you'll meet Betty. And if Tom also knows Susan, Heather, and Kimberly . . . well, then you owe Tom a fruit basket.

Now, while there’s success in numbers, don’t fool yourself. Women notice when a men gets rejected, even if he’s half away across the room. Most guys keep trying over and over, and by the end of the night their heads hung down low and they reek of desperation. Will they see success after the twentieth time? Sure, they might. However, most guys don’t have a large enough emotional bank account to handle that much rejection, especially in one single night.
What Real Men Say: "I played on a Zog soccer team for three years," says Andrew, 32. "I left the team as did another player to take a season off (which subsequently left two spots open). Kelly (my current girlfriend) and her roommate had just moved to Hoboken and joined Zog soccer as free agents and got put onto the team in my place. My friends on the team called me one day because they were short a player and asked if I could play that day to fill in. They introduced me Kelly, whom I immediately started crushing on. I told them to let me know if they ever needed a player again -- and then I started going back anytime they needed someone so I could see her. The season ended, so I decided to play the next season with them and developed some chemistry with her. We got together, and the rest is history."
It can be difficult to meet new people in a city, more specifically, it can be tough to meet women in a city. It seems that everyone’s post-college go-to spot to mingle with the opposite sex is a bar, nightclub, discotheque, whatever you want to call it. Basically, somewhere that supplies large amounts of alcohol, dim lights, and loud music (which are all factors to help you get laid). But how do you meet women that you may want to ask out (gasp!) on an actual date. There have to be other options between being that creepy guy at a bar that tries to get in bachelorette party dance circle and creating an online dating profile.
Meeting a potential relationship partner does not have to be confusing or challenging, especially when you have a particular goal in mind. You will often have the best success when you look in the places and ways that will bring you in touch with likeminded people. Specifically, long-term relationships are often found with others who are focused on similar long-term religious, spiritual, or educational activities in their daily lives. In contrast, short-term and sexual relationships can best be found with others who have such immediate excitement and pleasure on their mind—usually in the nightlife of bars, clubs, and restaurants. Finally, finding some specific relationship preference and need can often be accomplished by networking with others who are compatible in those ways—either online or through social groups. In any case, finding others with similar love life preferences and goals will bring you closer to satisfying yours.
If you’re not confident in your looks, you may be tempted to hide behind a low-quality or strategically cropped profile picture—don’t. “Make sure your profile picture is clear and shows both your face and body,” Van Kirk says. “This is not just about showing how attractive you are—women feel safer about online dating if they feel like they know who they’re talking to.” That said, studies have shown that guys get the best responses when their profile pics show them looking away from the camera and not smiling.

If you’re not confident in your looks, you may be tempted to hide behind a low-quality or strategically cropped profile picture—don’t. “Make sure your profile picture is clear and shows both your face and body,” Van Kirk says. “This is not just about showing how attractive you are—women feel safer about online dating if they feel like they know who they’re talking to.” That said, studies have shown that guys get the best responses when their profile pics show them looking away from the camera and not smiling.
We know that life is busy and want dating to fit easily into your free time. You can download the EliteSingles dating app to enjoy the flexibility and mobility of dating on your smartphone or if you prefer desktop dating sites, you can choose the options that work best for you. If you’re hoping to meet single women in your area, let us help you do it! And remember to give yourself the best chance by creating an engaging profile with interesting details about your life and a selection of photos.
"I met my girlfriend Stephanie at a book signing for Karen Russell," he says. "The line was kind of disorderly, so I turned to the person behind me and said, 'I didn't cut you, did I?' and she said, 'No.' That was Stephanie. I said, 'So are you a big Karen Russell fan?' and she said, 'Yes.' I asked who some of her other favorite authors were, and we chatted briefly. She got her book signed, then I got mine signed. Afterward I turned around, and she was standing there waiting for me. It turned out we were both going to Grand Central, so we walked there together. We had very immediate, very obvious chemistry. We got to the corner where we needed to split up, and Stephanie said, 'I want to keep talking to you though.' Her train was leaving shortly before mine, so I went with her to her train, then jumped off just as the doors were closing and hurried to catch my train. I had given her my business card, and she emailed me the next day. We've been together for almost five years."
You are on the hunt and don't let anything get in the way! If you are still struggling with approaching women in public (and you are definitely not alone) there are a few books that made a huge difference in our success with older women. You could take a blanket along and lounge around while Fido does his thing, or you can actively seek the attention of an older woman by asking her a question or two about her own pet.

Look, man, most guys are doing this dating thing all wrong. Someone once told me, if you wanted to sell a book, the hardest place to sell it is a bookstore. Why? Because you are competing with all the other books. I don’t know if that’s true, but it’s definitely true when it comes to dating. If you go to bars, clubs or searching online then you are competing with every other guy there.
If you’re a physically active person or you’re trying to get back into shape what better way than to kill two birds with one stone than join a workout group, a co-ed sports league, or maybe even a running club if you’re into running. The beauty about joining these clubs besides finding like minded people (if you’re a workout warrior or love being physically active), having accountability, & a fun way to get into shape is that it helps you expand your social circle & these classes are usually heavily populated with fit & attractive women looking to break a sweat & socialize. I’d also like to add from my own personal experience is that because of the accountability & support system you’re more likely to stay with your fitness goals since you’re doing it with other people who are going through the same thing as you & you’re never bored.

As a general rule, women are more approachable and less suspicious when they meet guys through the course of a regular day and in an atmosphere when they feel at ease, as opposed to when a guy introduces himself in a more typical setting (bars or clubs, for example). For a lot of women, anything with a meat-market vibe is not ideal for meetin men, and if you go through this list motivated only by a slavering desire for sex, women will detect that insincerity, and you'll fool exactly nobody. Don't look at these as pickup strategies; just think of them as generally positive habits that happen to have an added benefit.
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