Too many men are self-absorbed and complacent. They are seemingly content to just sit around playing video games and zoning out. The average age of those playing video games is 25-30 years old. Here is another statistic that will show you why marriages are failing so badly, or why women are not getting married: 26.5 years old is the average age for marriage today compared to 21.5 thirty years ago. The very age that the average single gets married is also the average age that the video gamers are hitting their height of enthusiasm. They get married and they play video games. Then by the time they are thirty, when they are ready to give up video games, they have ruined their marriages. That is not the only factor, but it is a very important factor. One article I read said it is because men are so immature, and they get together with their friends and play these video games. Video games of themselves are not wrong, but who has the time for them when you are a father, or when you are at the prime age for marriage?
Indian dating is heavily influenced by the custom of arranged marriages which require little dating, although there are strong indications that the institution is undergoing change, and that love marriages are becoming more accepted as India becomes more intertwined with the rest of the world. In the cities at least, it is becoming more accepted for two people to meet and try to find if there is compatibility.
Having clarity about which type of dating you are doing is helpful not just for me, but for yourself (and your date), so you can figure out what the heck is going on. Many relationship problems I’ve seen stem from couples not being on the same page about what type of dating they are doing (i.e. one person is more serious and wants the relationship to go somewhere, while the other just wants to have fun).
One report suggested the United States as well as other western-oriented countries were different from the rest of the world because "love is the reason for mating," as opposed to marriages being arranged to cement economic and class ties between families and promote political stability. Dating, by mutual consent of two single people, is the norm. British writer Kira Cochrane, after moving to the U.S., found herself grappling with the American approach to dating. She wondered why it was acceptable to juggle "10 potential partners" while weighing different attributes; she found American-style dating to be "exhausting and strange." She found dating in America to be "organized in a fairly formal fashion" with men approaching women and asking point blank for a date; she found this to be "awkward." She described the "third date rule" which was that women weren't supposed to have sex until the third date even if they desired it, although men were supposed to try for sex. She wrote: "Dating rules almost always cast the man as aggressor, and the woman as prey, which frankly makes me feel nauseous." Canadian writer Danielle Crittenden, however, chronicling female angst, criticized a tendency not to take dating seriously and suggested that postponing marriage into one's thirties was problematic:
Several months ago I was invited by the Sichuan University of Finance and Economics and the Sichuan University of Nationalities to conduct a seminar on “Setting Boundaries in Dating.” The purpose of the seminar was to provide an opportunity for dialog and reflection with the participants, who are expected to get married within the next decade, and to help ensure that when that time comes they would use their utmost wisdom in making the most important decision of their lives.
There's something wonderful, I think, about taking chances on love and sex. ... Going out on a limb can be roller-coaster scary because none of us want to be rejected or to have our heart broken. But so what if that happens? I, for one, would rather fall flat on my face as I serenade my partner (off-key and all) in a bikini and a short little pool skirt than sit on the edge of the pool, dipping my toes in silence.